One bright sunny day, at age 18, Barry Shainbaum stood at a bus stop in his hometown of Hamilton with a guitar in his hand. As he got on the bus, he had a premonition that he was somehow leaving.
Shortly after, standing in his girlfriend’s living room, he experienced a mental breakdown.
Two days later, he awoke from a long sleep to see his mother sitting beside his bed in the psychiatric ward of a local hospital.
“You’re sick, and you will be for the rest of your life,” she said, repeating the doctor’s comment. “We’ll take care of you.”
This was where he spent the rest of that summer before returning to school.
Then at age 21, Shainbaum experienced another episode while on his way to see his psychiatrist, who then diagnosed him as manic depressive. Now known as bipolar disorder, the condition is characterized by a series of moods that fluctuate between mania (feeling indestructible and hyperactive) and depression. He was put on Lithium to level his moods and was told he’d be on the medication permanently.
Over the years, while working on his own photography business, he experienced additional bouts of depression, the worst of which came about in 1986, leading him to spend a year-and-a-half at a downtown psychiatric boarding house. He spent most of his days reading the daily papers at the local library and then sitting in a nearby park in the afternoons watching children play as he munched on potato chips and drank pop.
He went to bed each night praying he wouldn’t wake up. Yet he didn’t believe killing his body was a solution, because “people are spiritual beings first,” he said. In addition to receiving psychotherapy, he read psychology and self-help books and explored metaphysical approaches, including astrology, karma, Kabbalah, and bioenergetic therapy. Continuing to explore his spiritual and physical self, he went on to re-establish himself and his life.
Despite the odds, today, youthful looking and full of zest for life, Shainbaum, 56, is completely cured of the mental illness. He continuously sprinkles inspiration working as a successful commercial photographer, author, inspirational speaker, musician, and host of radio talk show “Perspectives with Barry Shainbaum.”
“I once read that God doesn’t give someone any more challenges than he or she can handle,” said Shainbaum, his eyes sparkling as he smiled from his seat on the black leather couch of his downtown Toronto photography studio. “I think there’s a lot of truth in that. We strengthen ourselves through life’s challenges.
“There are great lessons that can come from suffering. Part of the purpose of mine was for me to get to know myself, to find my inner fortitude and understand what I should do with my life.”
In July 1998, Shainbaum took on a project he believes he’d have never considered if it weren’t for his past. Inspired by a conversation with the late Charles Templeton, former renowned Canadian author and journalist, he came up with the idea to produce a book containing portraits of celebrities, political leaders, and others embodying integrity that have made a positive impact on the world.
The book, Hope & Heroes, was turned down by 200 publishers before finally being produced in 2001. When the Hamilton Spectator interviewed Shainbaum about his book, he opened up about his journey “from mental illness to mental health” publicly for the first time. He soon found himself featured by various media outlets, and strangers from all over commended his courage.
“I was scared,” said Shainbaum. “What I had been through was like a deep, dark, dirty secret for me. But by talking about my experiences publicly and helping other people through that, I didn’t feel demolished inside anymore.”
Nurturing a strong will to assist others, Shainbaum went on to become a motivational speaker, encouraging others to discover their own hero within and move from obstacles to opportunities.
Shainbaum’s radio show gig on Kitchener’s 94.3 Faith FM came three years ago, and it now also broadcasts in London and Woodstock. The show presents a Jewish slant on various societal issues, including mental health, inspiration and motivation, the arts, and ethics, all with a touch of wisdom from guests spanning all walks of life.
“The purpose of the show is to bring an element of inspiration and greater knowledge on choosing life and to educate,” said Shainbaum.
To find out more about Barry, visit www.barryshainbaum.com
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